Despite all the recent furore over Amazon (search results for Amazonfail), I’ve been a happy customer of theirs for many years. You can buy anything on Amazon. It’s like an online Woolworths without the pick ‘n’ mix.
One of the things I really like about Amazon is the recommended products feature. Every time I log in they try to entice me with a list of DVDs or CDs that they think I’ll like based on stuff I’ve bought from them in the past. On the whole the products they recommend are pretty accurate.
However today Amazon failed. Forget all that business about dropping adult material from their searches, today Amazon thought that I might like to buy Demons on DVD.
WTF? Demons single handedly put the turd back into Saturday!
I loved Philip Glenister in Life On Mars and Ashes to Ashes but even he couldn’t save this utterly apalling show. His ridiculous American accent has made him the Dick Van Dyke of a new generation.
The dialogue was full of more cliches than the Arsenal left backs family Christmas dinner, the effects more special than a convoy of Sunshine Variety buses and the acting of the “guest stars” suggested that they’d rather be somewhere else. Like most of the viewing audience.
I know after my recent outburst that I should be grateful that ITV drama actually made a program that attempted something different from the norm. Fuck it, I should be grateful that they actually made a program at all but watching it made me feel angry. It just felt like a massive waste of budget. They could have spent that money commissioning projects from the wealth of undiscovered talent we have in the UK.
So needless to say, Amazon, you’ve disappointed me. You’ve failed. We’ve been together long enough for you to know that I’d rather stir fry my own testicles than buy this pile of shite. I still love you but start showing me some recommendations that’ll have me reaching for my credit card rather than just reaching.