Frustrations Of Being An (Out Of Work) Actor

photo credit: Jeff Kubina

When you tell people that you’re an actor, one of the first things they’ll inevitably say to you is “Ooh..have I seen you in anything?”. By “anything” they’re normally referring to a soap opera or a commercial rather than theatre. Mention Chekhov and they assume you’re talking about the bloke from Star Trek.

After establishing that they swear they spotted you in the background of the Queen Vic, the next thing they’ll say is “Are you resting at the moment?” and this will normally be accompanied with the old inverted commas finger gesture to accentuate the word resting. You know the one.

At this point I either respond with

1. Physical violence
2. A diatribe about how I’m not actually resting but that I’m spending my waking hours trying to secure work. I’ve slept with 14 casting directors this month, my bums sore and I’m seriously considering mugging the Big Issue seller outside Tottenham Court Road station.

Sometimes I combine the two. I find it helps get my point across.

The fact is that nobody understands what it’s like to be an out of work actor apart from another out of work actor. People will sympathise with you and come up with “helpful” suggestions but, to be honest, the vast majority of folks have no idea of the shit we go through to try to secure work.

Anyone who gets into this game is setting themselves up for failure. If you have a problem with rejection, get into another game. In my opinion, 95% of the work is getting the work in the first place. Applying for castings, speculatively sending out your CV and headshot, networking, attending auditions, scouring the online and offline casting resources, ringing your agent.

One of the best pieces of advice I got when I was training was “get yourself another job”. The vast majority of actors are unemployed so you need to find other ways to pay your bills. You need a job flexible enough to allow you the time to attend auditions but you also need to pay the rent. Most actors I know balance two or three jobs.

So going back to the original purpose of this post, I wanted to share some advice with the non-acting fraternity out there who might have friends who are actors or, God forbid, who bump into me and do the “resting” finger thing.

• Do not suggest I get another agent. Do you have any idea how hard it is to find a good agent? They are like rocking horse shit.
• Do not suggest I apply for The Bill. I already have. Many times. They have wallpapered the offices of the casting offices with my 10×8.
• Do not suggest I get a proper job. I will kill you to death if you do.
• Do not ask if I’ve looked in The Stage recently. I do not want to be a pole dancer or gay chat line operator.
• Do not suggest I do some am-dram to “keep my hand in”. The only place my hand will be in is your face if you say this.
• Do not suggest temping. I look shit in a skirt.

With ITV cutting their drama budget by 40%, the Beeb chopping £400m from their budget and the big film studios all saying they’re reducing the number of films they’re putting out this year, the situation is only going to get worse so do yourself a favour. If you meet any actors over the coming weeks, remember my advice.

Oh and don’t do that finger thing either.

Tagged as: Acting, bbc, itv